@meyera4 Thank you 
@anon25197097 Feeling better today, thank you. 
I had work yesterday, which was so busy I didn’t have time to think about anything else so that was good in a sense. I’m home today, so it’ll probably be a quiet one. I still feel quite tired, so a nap may be I’m my future 
I spent an hour on the phone to my mum on [name_f]Sunday[/name_f] and that made me feel better - she also miscarried, so she was very relatable and reassuring.
Hubby had a neurologist appointment yesterday, and the specialist confirmed that his condition is not the hereditary type, and we don’t have to factor that in as a concern for our babies. Best news! That makes me feel better on one level, but then also makes the dark part of my brain go “see, it is your fault”. I hate feeling so helpless! 
Not knowing why is the worst.