Thank you so much!
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[name_m]January[/name_m] 3rd for the time being 
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@WildroseofJuillet i think we were in the same group last time, right? I seem to remember your username.
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Your username looks familiar to me too! I think we were! Our little guy was born [name_m]September[/name_m] '24
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Z was the end of [name_m]August[/name_m] 2024 so that makes sense. It’s nice to see you here again and so exciting to be in the same expecting group again.
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So we are going for a private scan next week, my mum very kindly got us a gift card for a local ultrasound clinic…I think it’s more because she’s desperate to know if it’s single or multiple pregnancy.
Excited to see baby and get a firmer idea of a due date, it’s hard for me to pin in down because my periods were still quite irregular.
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Ooh yes, I remember now! So cool to be in the same group again! 
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19 week update! we just had our ultrasound and found out the gender!!
[name_m]Baby[/name_m] was still being uncooperative like last time, we got some of the measurements, but I’ll have to go back next week to try again. [name_m]Baby[/name_m] was in a breach position first, and later rolled up into a tiny ball 
[name_m]Baby[/name_m] has a strong heart, and nice looking four chambers 
Everything is feeling more real now that we know what we’re having; we are so excited! We planned to keep the gender a secret for a little bit, but it might be harder to do that than we anticipated haha 
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So excited for you!! Did you know it’s okay if you want to share it with all of us… we’re just random people you’ll never meet anyhow… 
[name_m]Just[/name_m] joking… Totally wait to share your news in whatever order you deem best!
So excited! It makes me think my ultrasound is just right around the corner. That’s why I love hearing about you all so much. It totally ramps up the excitement.
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I’m sorry baby was not cooperating, but I am glad their heart is looking healthy and strong! I hope they cooperate more next week and that you get the relief of seeing more good things.
I had my anatomy scan yesterday morning and thankfully after a little break to try to get baby to shift we were able to get good shots of heart. Baby is looking healthy, and while we expected that it was still somehow a relief. We finally told my mom that we know the sex but that we aren’t sure yet if we will share. I prefer not to because I would rather get unisex items vs gendered ones if people want to buy things. I kind of wish we didn’t know, either, but that ship has sailed.
I am ruminating about names more than is useful. We have a top 4 or 5 names and I did a very silly thing of combing through state data to do my own re-ranking similar to the playground analysis from Nameberry. I didn’t finish it, but it gives me a better sense of true popularities were we live. I really don’t want more than two children, so it feels like my last chance to really love a name I give to a child. I think I still feel a little sad about compromising and not using River for Ro. I don’t want matching initials, so it isn’t on the list as a first name for this baby, but if we don’t use Caspian as a first name, River or Linden will probably be the middle even though my husband’s favorite middle name so far is Emerson.
Anyway, we probably have 20 more weeks to go back and forth about names and the healthiest thing is probably to table it for another couple of months and see how I feel. The names aren’t going anywhere and I have all the data I am likely to have now.
I hope everyone else is doing well!
Edited to add: Oh also this is my first time being both AMA and with a hospital-based/traditional OB practice rather than a midwifery-based birth center practice (though I delivered in a hospital). The care feels very different and I have to have a 32-week growth scan. It isn’t bad different, at least not right now, but it is strange in how they both assume more risk and spend less time on talking through things in a regular appointment. I am hoping they will let me go past 40 weeks if I am comfortable doing that again, but it seems less likely between the type of practice and my (barely advanced) age.
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I’m 42 and this is my 5th AMA baby. My OB said the bad statistics were negligible because I’d had one healthy baby. I hope that is comforting and what you’re hearing, too.
(Sorry in advance for this… [name_m]Just[/name_m] sharing some of my struggles with you all to let you know of my childbirth battles.)
I’m so skeptical about medical care. Being pregnant again feels scary and frustrating b/c the stats are all blown out of proportion and I don’t feel like I can really trust any healthcare provider. This will be my 5th c-section. It’s commonly known that you can’t vbac after 3 tries, but the scare tactic they use (UR) has a percentage of occurrence (after 4 cs) of 2%. Them the likelihood of anything bad happening because of UR is anywhere from 0-6.2%. So my chance of something catastrophic is .02x.062(=.142%)… Which is significant because we don’t want anything bad to happen, ever. But .142% is not compared to 0%. And that percentage includes anything and everything catastrophic happening within the 28 days after baby is born.
CS is major surgery, and we all know it is not without risk. It just burns me up to hear how “dangerous” VBAC is. I haven’t met an OB yet who could show me otherwise. I’ve tried… 4 times… and I’m still in this dungeon of “standard of care” with doctors who walk around with their thumbs in their ears and their eyes squeezed tightly shut.
In 2025 a practice bulletin was put out by ACOG (American College of Obstetrics and Gyno) discussing ways to decrease primary CS rates in [name_f]America[/name_f]. They stated that the EFM (those hockey pucks they put on your belly to ensure the baby’s heart rate is good) was not a good way to determine fetal health and it was causing too many women to be surgically delivered. This was me in 2017, after heart decelerations indicated a need for emergency CS… after I’d taken pitocin and cervadil (both, category X drugs) for induction. Finally, it seems that ACOG is catching up.
I wish there was something I could do to change the way things are. [name_f]Any[/name_f] mom would choose the 100% safety route, but that’s just kind of deceptive. Childbirth is risky no matter which way you do it.
End rant.
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I’m sorry you have had such bad experiences with care. Thankfully that has not been my experience, and I am honestly not stressed or worried about the AMA stuff. I am hoping to be able to be pregnancy past 40 weeks if that’s the way things go on their own and everything is healthy, but I also had a perfectly fine induction experience before and so am not actively trying to avoid it either.
Re: continuous monitoring, I actually had that with my daughter (in 2024) because of being induced and in my case was thankful once the pushing started. It was very very annoying before then, especially because she kept moving in ways overnight that had them moving the monitor and waking me up in the process, but during the pushing it allowed them to tell me when I needed to pause in the pushing due to heart decelerations. [name_m]The[/name_m] pauses in pushing allowed her heart rate to go back up.
Wouldn’t it make sense that medications used for induction would be considered “category x” because of the fact that they can induce labor? I would imagine that their use, if someone were not trying to induce labor, would be harful specifically because preterm labor is a major health risk for the fetus. I dont’ ean to downplay your negative experiences, and I trust in you about your experiences, but wanted to point that out.
All in all I think there is a lot of challenge within any large systems - healthcare, education, etc. - to navigate evidence-based work, appropriately manage risk without over-management or care/work that is overly focused on prevention of getting sued vs what work is most helpful for an individual, and navigating how much variation there really is in every person and every experience. There are so many parties attempting to dictate healthcare in particular that I think it creates a barrier to a lot of people getting truly individualized care. And that sucks, but also putting it into that lens helps me to think about where the advocacy toward change is probably most effectively directed. (Like me needing to call my insurance company and voice complaints over them repeatedly failing to keep healthcare providers in network - first one of the few independent OBGYN practices in my area and now potentially one of the largest healthcare providers in the area, where I get my primary and endocrinology care).
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I’m so glad to hear your ultrasound went well!
And I totally get where you’re coming from, it’s so hard to narrow down which name to use, especially if it’s your last chance to use them!
My husband really wanted me to rein in my list early, so luckily we already have ours picked out. But it’s hard to say ‘not yet’ to the other names on my list (we plan to have another baby down the road).
It’s interesting to hear of your experience so far with the OB vs midwife. I’m just using an OB, because I wanted to deal with less people and get acquainted with those specialist early on, rather than meeting a midwife, and in a scenario that I couldn’t have my birth with them, I’d have to deal with an OB anyways.
I’m also hoping to form a bond with my OB, which will reduce my stress. Lol
All the best going forward for you!
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Firstly, I’m really glad that your experience has been positive. I wish that could be true for all women!
Well, yes, that’s true, but there’s also a correlation between stress on the baby’s heart (deceleration) and the call for surgery. It’s expected that a baby would experience some degree of distress under those conditions. [name_m]The[/name_m] article I read was helpful in mentioning ways to try to avoid primary cs. Things I wish my hcp knew 9 years ago
Absolutely. I deeply lament the failure of healthcare providers to be able to tailor the care of individuals due to the fear of litigation. It’s a systemic issue: natural, but also a result of a broken system.
Sorry to hear of your insurance issues! That is not a fun battle to fight!
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We had our private ultrasound on [name_m]Thursday[/name_m], we have an official due date of [name_m]The[/name_m] 17th of [name_m]December[/name_m] for baby number 4. [name_m]Not[/name_m] another twin pregnancy which I’m very relieved about! [name_m]Baby[/name_m] looked good and is measuring within the normal range and it’s good to know that my own calculations on due dates weren’t too far off and I like knowing how far along I am with a little more certainty.
When reading all your comments about midwife led or OB led care it struck me as to how in most other countries OB led is the norm whereas in the UK midwife led is the standard and doctors only really get involved in complex cases. [name_m]Even[/name_m] when I was pregnant with the twins I only saw a doctor two or three times and all he was doing was pushing for me to have caesarean because of it being a twin pregnancy but I got my vaginal delivery and had a wonderful midwife who specialises in twins. I have nothing but positives when it comes to the care I got from the midwives at my hospital.
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Is it common to be off? I found a 12 day discrepancy between my days and the ob measurements. Does it happen that way, where everything ends up being okay? My next sonogram is [name_f]Wednesday[/name_f].
I’ve heard midwives are much better for delivering babies. I had no idea going into this. - from Ohio
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I don’t know if it’s common to be honest, I just wasn’t super sure due to my cycle being very irregular so it was hard to go off my last period when trying to calculate. My calculations was putting the due date around the 21st of [name_m]December[/name_m] but the scan is saying the 17th.
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My baby measured a few days behind at the 20 week scan but was back on track for his due date at 28 weeks. I believe at least 1 other expectant mom on the forum here has a baby measuring a few days ahead of their due date. It does seem like a guessing game sometimes.
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[name_m]The[/name_m] date of my LMP and the 8 week sonogram were 12 days off. It’s a lot for the 8 week sonogram! My cycle has been irregular*, but it doesn’t seem possible for this baby to be 12 days younger than my LMP projects. I’ve looked at the data and am very confused. Maybe you guys can make more sense of it!
LMP 3/17 (last cycles were 26-28-24-24-29-26-26)
Possible ovulation (my feelings, no tests) 4/2(ish)
Negative pregnancy test 4/10
Positive 4/14
Sonogram 5/15 (baby dated 6w+3) [name_m]Doc[/name_m] said baby looked perfect and showed me his strong heartbeat.
If the baby was truly 6w+3, fertilization would have happened a day or so prior to the positive test. It wasn’t the faint line I saw when I found out I was pregnant with another pregnancy at 3w, but very distinctly positive. What am I missing? How can this baby possibly be okay? [name_f]Every[/name_f] time I pee, I’m expecting to start my period. It’s so scary. [name_m]The[/name_m] next sonogram is this [name_f]Wednesday[/name_f].
*Irregular. This is not terribly constant but also not terribly irregular. [name_m]Not[/name_m] enough to warrant such a different due date anyway. Plus it doesn’t explain the positive test, so early in this baby’s life
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So with my first my due date was pushed up by two to three weeks after a dating ultrasound. [name_m]The[/name_m] dating ultrasound was called for when my provider looked at me and said I was already looking like I Was showing which wouldn’t make sense if I was the date I was giving them.Being a first time parent I had no idea about implantation bleeding so that messed up my idea of LMP.
With my 4th my due date was pushed up 11 days. It was actually miraculous because the baby’s heartbeat did not shown up on Doppler until my 17 week appointment (and even then it took a minute!) baby was too active. My first in person appointment was when I thought baby was 11 weeks. Because they didn’t show up on Doppler they sent us for an ultrasound and that’s when we found out about the dating mismatch.
With my current one I’m actually surprised that they’re going by my LMP get and that it hasn’t been up at all because every ultrasound so far has shown that the ultrasound dating is mostly up a week compared to my LMP dating.
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