So frustrating 
Update: I realized yesterday afternoon that I was misremembering the first day of my last cycle (it was a crazy month 
). I was off by a few days, which now still makes me late for the next AF, but it also means I was testing early, so I feel a little less crazy. The smells started hitting me yesterday - that range of smells that I have only ever sensed while pregnant. To SO and I, that’s the definite sign. I would still very much like to have this confirmed by a positive test, and after the last miscarriage, I’m not sure it’ll feel real until I see the little lima bean on the ultra sound. I think I’ll test again [name_m]Friday[/name_m] morning, and hopefully get on progesterone over the weekend to help give this one a better chance of making it through the first trimester.
Thanks for coming along for the journey!
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I don’t test unless I’m at least 5 days late, I couldn’t handle the hope and disappointment and worse, actually seeing the possible very early miscarriages that happen all the time.
6 months in, and it’s getting a little hard. I’m stressing about my age too I guess, since I’m now considered old to be pregnant.
Don’t let anyone tell you you’re “too old.” The age thing is a relatively new “advancement” in obstetrics (read eye roll here). I always hoped for a large family, but didn’t get married until age 31. I had my son at age 33… most people tell me it’s “easier when you’re younger,” but they don’t account for the maturity gained in the years you have longed for your own child, nor the incredible thankfulness because the blessing was withheld for so long. Don’t lose hope!
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Thank you @kapaza I appreciate your encouragement/supportive words and real life experience 
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[name_f]My[/name_f] doctors appointment went alright yesterday. The doctor said she wasn’t concerned at all about the length of my cycle since I also ovulate early, and also wan’t concerned about the spotting. She said she finds women with a uterus that isn’t in the traditional up and down position pretty commonly have spotting before and/or after (I have a retroverted uterus). She did say my thyroid is a tad high, but not enough to think it is an issue unless I have more miscarriages. She said it is something we will keep an eye on and when we go to the infertility clinic will probably check again. She said if she had my cycle she would feel very good about it, and that essentially everything sounded perfect to her.
However, after hearing about my husband’s sperm analysis numbers she said she thinks IUI is really the path forward for us. She said obviously to keep trying, but she doesn’t think his count will improve much. We have an appointment with the fertility clinic in [name_u]June[/name_u], but she encouraged me to get on the cancellation list which she said is “is for couples exactly like your situation”. I did call and get on the cancellation list, so we will see if we can get in sooner.
I think today is marking the turning point where I am really giving up much hope that things will work out for us on our own, and coming to terms with the treatments we most likely need. On one hand this is somewhat hopeful after having no answers or guidance, but on the other I am definitely grieving the experience of getting pregnant that we aren’t going to have.
The spotting turned into passing clots today. Along with the pregnancy smells, it sure seems like another early miscarriage.
We weren’t even going to try this cycle, and we’ve had a surprise pregnancy and loss in one week. I’m a bit overwhelmed to be able to process all this. In addition, my 6yo old had a bad fall at school today and was ordered bed rest for a few days. It was a full day. I’m taking this as a sign that it might be time to look into what’s going on with my body. Thyroid problems run in my family. Maybe there’s something else in my body that needs attention before considering ttc right away.
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@jk_garrison Sorry to hear about a stressful week 
I have an appointment to get my IUD out on [name_f]Wednesday[/name_f] which is exciting in that I am ready to have a period that is not super heavy! I have had a copper IUD for 2 years. We are hoping to do a not trying not preventing method for several months, which will be an exercise in patience for me, since even with the IUD I have obsessively temped my cycle for years. I first test in letting go!
Well, in classic NHS style we have handed over our forms to sign up to the GP. When we’ll actually be on the register and seen by them is anyone’s guess 
I also was offered a new job this week (hurray!) which means I’ll be able to work from home 3/5 days a week. [name_m]Just[/name_m] need to wait for things to come through.
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@jk_garrison Sorry to hear about your week. [name_f]Hope[/name_f] you can take the time to process, sending you love.
@Beort12 [name_f]Glad[/name_f] the appointment went ok and that you’ve got on the cancellation list. Hopefully you get a call soon and that things progress well from there.
Still on the TWW here, AF due [name_f]Monday[/name_f]. Have been having weirdness in the stomach and lower back pain for a few days now though could be completely unrelated, and tonight the weirdness feels more like cramping. Had some optimism but that is now waning. I didn’t really ‘feel’ early pregnancy with my son, but I’ve not had any of the same signs I had with my loss baby either, so I’m just going to have to keep playing the waiting game.
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2 x BFN and finally AF… 
[name_f]My[/name_f] cycle was a bit long this go round, so I’m not quite sure what was going on. [name_m]Ah[/name_m] well, on the the next attemp. 
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Out this month, AF arrived. Only positive is my cycle is back to what it used to be after a couple of erratic months after the miscarriage.
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Tried to conceive in 2022 and it didn’t happen, so TTC in 2023!
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Still no word back from the new doctors about appointments etc.
Waiting for my usual testing day for this week, then think I might get some ovulation testing strips (just the LH surge ones) to check myself that it’s even happening.
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Had a bit of a weird one the other night
Summary
Had some very heavy clotting, not like when I normally get AF, more like when I had the miscarriage. [name_m]Feel[/name_m] like it may have been a very early miscarriage that I didn’t even know I was pregnant for but can’t be certain either way, and I’m guessing there’s medical way of proving it now either. Still a bit unsettled by it all.
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I’m having a very weird one right now. Started my period on Vday. Not like spotting, like real period. Then it just stopped, and nothing since. I don’t know if there’s a chance I might be pregnant or if my body is trolling me and my period will start again in a couple of days. I don’t want to test yet because if it happens that I’m pregnant and I have an early miscarriage in a couple of days, I’d rather think it’s my regular period. I’ll test when I’m actually late for my period (I was expecting it somewhere between yesterday and this weekend). Still, weird.
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My cycle has been a rock-solid 27 days for the past 5-6 cycles. I’m now on day 28 with no obvious temp shift down 
We’re out of town for our competition and I forgot to toss in a pregnancy test from my home stash 
Gotta get to a store!
I hope the weirdness settles down for you, @SoJoCo and @Eirime!
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Well, no more weirdness for me, my period is back after 3 days of hope.
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Aw
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I’m just glad I didn’t waste a test for that.
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